Round and round

“Mom, I don’t know what to do with myself.  I want to do – but I don’t have the energy.”

“Just rest, Stacey.  Read a book.”

“I don’t really feel like reading a book – I’d rather be in my garden.”

“Then, go into your garden.”

“I don’t have the energy.”

“Then rest.”

“I don’t want to rest.  I want to do.”

“Stacey, you need to be patient.”

“I know.  I don’t like it.  I’m frustrated that I don’t want to stay in – but I don’t want to go out.  It is so nice outside I feel I should be outside.”

“Then, go outside and sit in the chair.”

“But I don’t want to just sit.  sigh.  I don’t know what I want.”

“Your body needs rest.  When you have a rest, you’ll feel better.”

“I know.”

“You have been through a lot.  You cannot push.”

“I know.”

“It will take time before you recover.  In time, you will regain your strength and you will want to do things again.”

“I know, Mom.  I know you are right.  It’s frustrating. I feel well enough that I know that I want to do something, but not well enough to actually do it.  I feel like the buds on those trees – they want to burst out but won’t until conditions are ready.  They have so much potential and yet, they wait.”

“I know, Stacey.  I know.”

“Yes, Mom, I believe you do.”

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About inmycorner

This blog began as an opportunity to tell my Dad's stories. I sat with him and the computer and together we told stories. It was a wonderful way to get to know Dad. He was 9. He and Mom had a wonderful life together and since she passed away a year and a half before him - Dad was ready to join her. I no longer tell his stories but have found stories of my own. The impetus to resume this blog was the discovery that I had stage 4 ovarian cancer. Since blogging had been so therapeutic for my dad and I to get through our grief, I felt maybe this would be a good outlet to process my situation. I also hoped it may serve as an outreach to anyone else who is facing this very ominous journey. So far, so good.
This entry was posted in cancer, personal journal, recovery and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Round and round

  1. I push too hard and my body pushes back – hard! I get cocky I usually end up on my ass.

  2. kiwiskan says:

    Mom probably does – as we get older this one becomes a bit common for some of us…

  3. Gwen K says:

    Listen to your mom. Take it easy.

  4. She does know you well. 🙂

  5. Gallivanta says:

    Mum knows best. I am sure your children would agree. 😉

  6. RoSy says:

    Mom is always right. 😉

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