Good – Night – Irene

“I think once I’ve had that Benedryl it’ll be good-night”

“Good night, Irene!” replied my nurse today at chemo.

“How did you know that song?” I asked her feeling rather stunned.

“It just came to me”, she stated.  “Why?”

“Just before you came in the room, I focused on my Mom’s Christmas sweater that I was wearing.  And then I imagined that she was with me – taking care of me.  When you sang that song – I knew she was here because she used to sing that song to me.  I will dream about her tonight, I know it.”  I explained.

And so went the day today.  It was a very unusual day all around.  We, my family and I, had initially planned to be in Cuba for Christmas as we had been the year before.  But that didn’t happen.  My family and I, instead, were in the hospital – together – while I received my chemo.  Unusual.  I was supposed to be in a chair in the chemo suite.  Instead I had a private room and a bed.  Unusual.  We were supposed to be having racklette (sp?) for dinner.  Instead, we had pizza and Chinese food.  Unusual.  There were many new traditions set today – including the family reading of “The Night Before Christmas” which we were gifted this morning by a very dear friend.

My sister-in-law, Rita, spent the day trying to chase down medication I need for Boxing Day and vacuuming the house.  My mother-in-law spent time on her hands and knees scrubbing the floors so they would be clean when we came home from the hospital.  Our friends dropped off gifts to the front door, messaged us on facebook, phoned us, dropped by RVH on her day off for a visit… and it went on and on.  The magnitude of kindness people showed our family today was humbling.

I made it through the chemo well and, once again, count my blessings.

I didn’t think, when I received my diagnosis in September, that I would even see Christmas.  I thought it was a death sentence.  Yet – here we are – celebrating Christmas and I feel so much better than I had felt all summer.  I feel hopeful and thankful.

The greatest gift anyone could receive this Christmas is the realization of how beautiful life can really be.  Kevin and I both purposefully breathed this morning as we walked and really looked at what we were seeing in the moment.  It was glorious and time stood still for a while.

Right now, though, Irene awaits in my dreams.

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About inmycorner

This blog began as an opportunity to tell my Dad's stories. I sat with him and the computer and together we told stories. It was a wonderful way to get to know Dad. He was 9. He and Mom had a wonderful life together and since she passed away a year and a half before him - Dad was ready to join her. I no longer tell his stories but have found stories of my own. The impetus to resume this blog was the discovery that I had stage 4 ovarian cancer. Since blogging had been so therapeutic for my dad and I to get through our grief, I felt maybe this would be a good outlet to process my situation. I also hoped it may serve as an outreach to anyone else who is facing this very ominous journey. So far, so good.
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7 Responses to Good – Night – Irene

  1. My father had us hooked on this song and I was just singing it as I walked down the steps at work last week. 🙂 Sleep well Stacey. Celebrate in all of this love!!!

  2. Gallivanta says:

    A favourite song for us, too. What I didn’t know as a child, but which seems significant to me as an adult is that Irene means Peace. I hope your dreams were peaceful.

  3. kiwiskan says:

    I love that old song as well… I am so glad your Christmas is one of hope.

  4. Sending you many hugs…what a special Christmas you had ❤️

  5. inmycorner says:

    Reblogged this on In The Corner and commented:

    Hard to believe that only one year ago, I wasn’t sure I’d see another Christmas. My how things can change. Yet, I still pause and breathe – to appreciate the moments in each day. I feel so very blessed that I have been given this “extra” time to live. Wishing everyone good health, good friends, and good fortune. Merry Christmas!

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