Trudge, trudge, trudge. Huff, puff, huff.

Today’s post was inspired by this morning walk with Kevin (again) and the story of “The Little Engine that Could” (again).  This time, though, the two concepts “met”.  Enjoy.

Trudge, trudge, trudge.  Huff, puff, huff.  I walked through the snow this morning.  I was a happy person for I had such a jolly lot of blessings to carry.  My heart was filled with good wishes for good health from family and friends.

There was admiration, respect, encouragement.  There was love, faith, and hope.  And there were wishes to “get back on your feet” and “get back in the game” and “party -on”.  There were wishes of every kind that a person could want.

But that was not all.  Some of my heart was filled with good memories of things people sent me to eat.  There were free-range eggs, organic apples, and yummy home-made soups.  There rich casseroles, deep-dish lasagnas, and hearty stews.  There were decadent chocolates, delicious donuts, and buttery cookies to boot!

I was carrying all these wonderful wishes with me to get to my family and friends on the other side of treatment.  I walked along merrily on the snow-plowed side-walk and partly through the knee – deep un-plowed path.  I was half-way through.  Then all of a sudden I stopped with a jerk.  I simply could not go another inch.  I tried and tried, but my legs would just not move.  I had broken down.

What were all those good family and friends on the other side of my treatment going to do without the wonderful wishes I carried in my heart?

“Here comes the dog,” said the silly voice inside my head.  “Maybe she will tow me this morning through the knee deep snow.”

“Please, fur-covered beast, won’t you please pull me through this snow?  My engine has broken down and I need help.”

But the fur-covered beast stared at me as if to say, “I pull you?  I am a dog.  I have just romped through snow unfettered and free.  I frolicked and sniffed without a care in the world.  I am a lean playing machine.  I pull the likes of you?  Indeed not!”  And off she bounced back into the snow.

How sad I felt.  How I sobbed as I stood there without an ounce of energy left.  I was so frustrated.  There was a time when this would have been easy.  Now, it was the most challenging work-out I had ever had.

Then, I heard a loud machine in the distance.  It was a plow.  Surely the plow will notice my plight and come to plow the side-walk to allow me to continue?

“Please, please,” I thought.  “Come and dig me out of here!  My engine has stopped and I am frozen in my own foot-steps. I can’t got left and I can’t go right.”

But the plow bellowed, “I have a schedule to follow – and this path is not on my schedule.  It is not in my best interests to help you out right now.  Wait until later this afternoon and I will be back – on my own accord – to help you.”

And the plow plowed on.

Then, Kevin turned around and chugged merrily towards me.  When he saw me upset, he put his arms around me and said, “I will clear you a path.  You wait here and I will make a route for you to get to the road.”

Kevin looked up and saw the tears in my eyes.  “Cheer up, Stacey.  You can do this.  All you have to do is get to the road.  Then, it will be smooth sailing.”

“Okay,” I said and took in a deep breath.  The good wishes and good memories cheered me on and said, “We think you can, we think you can, we think you can.”  And with that, I moved forward just an inch.  “We think you can, we think you can, we think you can,” I remembered and moved forward even more.  Before I knew it – I was moving through the snow – closer and closer to the road.  I pumped my arms faster and faster and harder and harder and my legs followed in the rhythm.  “We think you can, we think you can, we think you can!” encouraged the voices in my head.  Faster and faster at snail-breaking speed, I walked until at last I reached the road.  Just ahead lay the snow-free path!

“Hurray, hurray,” cried Kevin.

“…….” cried Jazz.  (She’s a dog, what do you expect?)

And I smiled and puffed as I walked steadily beside Kevin down the path towards home.

“We knew you could , we knew you could, we knew you could.” recited the wishes from family and friends in my head.

I was a happy person for I had such a jolly lot of blessings to carry.  My heart was filled with good wishes for good health from family and friends.

Note:  “Thanks, everyone, for helping me through the “un-plowed” roads.”

About inmycorner

This blog began as an opportunity to tell my Dad's stories. I sat with him and the computer and together we told stories. It was a wonderful way to get to know Dad. He was 9. He and Mom had a wonderful life together and since she passed away a year and a half before him - Dad was ready to join her. I no longer tell his stories but have found stories of my own. The impetus to resume this blog was the discovery that I had stage 4 ovarian cancer. Since blogging had been so therapeutic for my dad and I to get through our grief, I felt maybe this would be a good outlet to process my situation. I also hoped it may serve as an outreach to anyone else who is facing this very ominous journey. So far, so good.
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9 Responses to Trudge, trudge, trudge. Huff, puff, huff.

  1. hopebringsstrength says:

    What a beautiful story of perseverance and determination. YOU CAN get through this you know! One unplowed road at a time. Much Love

  2. Teresa Smyth (Terry) says:

    Well Stacey, since I have entered your blogging world it is difficult for me to put it into words… you are a treasurer indeed, even though we don’t know each other very well. I have sent your link to my brother for words of encouragement. Cheers

    • inmycorner says:

      Thanks so much, Terry – those are such words of inspiration to me! Oh, I hope that can help. I don’t always respond well to other people’s stories about cancer for fear I may not “measure up”. I hope he is more open-minded. Enjoy your well deserved week-end! THanks for joining me on my journey!

  3. Gwen says:

    such an inspirational story. Love the Little Engine, love you too.

  4. Stacey this was amazing! I was reading, and getting ready to cry, then I was cheering!!!!! Yay for Kevin being the head cheer leader!!!!! 🙂

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